Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Hakuna Matata...

...it means no worries for the rest of your days.

Have you ever had one of those moments where you just KNOW God is speaking to you? It's almost as if your heart sprouts little ears...or something. Because when God speaks to you, it doesn't come to your ears (not mine, anwyay...). It comes to your heart. And ohhh it just sounds like the most beautiful song. One that warms you and sends tingles all throughout your body. One that brings a huge, ridiculous smile to your face. Anyway, I had one of those moments tonight. Actually, I had several of those moments tonight. God just spoke right to my heart and swept me off my feet.

I went to "College Group" at my friend Hannah's church tonight, and the talk was just wonderful. The Lord knew just what to say to bring joy and peace to my heart. Brian, the speaker, talked about trusting in the Lord and not worrying. That is, we are to trust Him completely and never worry about anything. At all. Ever. Yeah...easier said than done I think. But hear me out. What Brian said tonight was just so beautiful and it really touched my heart. He referenced Matthew 6:25-34, which (among other great things) says this: "'I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat [or drink], or about your body, what you will wear. [...] All these things the pagans seek. Your heavenly Father knows that you need them all. But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you.'" So to summarize that: Don't worry. Seek His kingdom. He will give us everything we need.

Another thing Brian said that I loved was this: "Worrying is as bad as swearing." When he first said that, I thought, "Well...I don't swear, so what relevance does that have to my life?" Brian clarified what he meant by adding, "Swearing is taking God's name in vain. Worrying is taking God's promises in vain." Hmmm...something to think about. As far as His name goes...any time I misuse God's name (not in the context of prayer or worship), I am taking it in vain. I am stomping on a name that is above every name. And for his promises...any time I tell God that I have my life under control, I am taking His promise in vain. Any time I worry about school, relationships, work, or any other aspect of my life, I am taking His promise in vain. God says, "For I know well the plans I have in mind for you [...] plans to give you a future full of hope" (Jeremiah 29:11). By worrying about these plans (having anxiety or trying to figure them out without prayer), I am pretty much slapping God in the face. He made a promise to me...I need to have peace with that and accept it!

One last thing: the fruits of the Spirit. Every time I read this passage in Galatians, I picture each word on a different piece of fruit. In my head I see an apple, orange, banana, pear, grape(s), peach, watermelon, pineapple, and a strawberry. On each piece of fruit there is one word written. "The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control" (Galatians 5:22-23). Can you picture each of those fruits? I love reading this. I love picturing myself as someone who has all of those characteristics. I also love knowing that with God's help, I can be that person I imagine. It will be difficult, yes, and I know I will struggle with some fruits more than others. But God calls us to live by the Spirit and not by the flesh. I had a sense from the Lord tonight that He wanted me to try living out one fruit at a time. I don't know how long I would need to practice each fruit, but I like the concept of trying one at a time, rather than all of them. Maybe I could do one fruit each week (that would be a total of 9 weeks)? Please let me know if you have any suggestions, and please pray that this little mission goes well.


Lord, thank You so much for speaking to my heart tonight. You always know just what to say. You make my heart smile. You make my spirit dance. You make my soul hungry for more of your grace. I want to be like You, God. Change my heart and my mind. Be the focus of every day, every hour, every minute, and every second of my life. Amen.

Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Be Bold

Yesterday was a pretty exceptional day. So exceptional that I'd like to share it with you. It started out like just another day...I had class in the morning and then another class in the afternoon. I decided to go to Mass at Christ the King between my classes, and it was such a wonderful way to spend an hour. The first reading was from Hebrews 2, where it says "What is man, that you are mindful of him? Or the son of man that you care for him?" I like this. Sometimes, when I'm having a rough day, this hits my heart just perfectly. Even when I'm not having a rough day, I love hearing this and being reminded that I am nothing...I am small and insignificant. And God is something...He is great and VERY significant. He is the creator of all things. Including you and me. And you know what He said when He created everything? He said "It is good." Not only were the plants and animals good, but He called US good, too. Fr. Ed, the priest at my church, gave a wonderful talk at Mass today with the message that we are to obey Jesus and to submit our lives FULLY to Him. Not partially...not just a few areas of our lives. FULLY. We are to submit FULLY. Every aspect of our lives. Yeah...not so easy to do. But that's where prayer comes in. Prayer is so darn powerful. God is just waiting for us to come to Him with our desires and thoughts...He wants us to hand over every single problem we have so that we don't have to worry about it anymore. Sounds great, right? Not having to worry about anything? Let's do it!

Another thing that made my day great yesterday was the UCO weekly prayer meeting. First of all, I got to play guitar and sing with the music team. That always makes me happy. I love using my talents to serve my King. :) The message at UCO this week was about evangelism. That is, telling others about Christ. Our mission leader Dave reminded us that we have a message of urgency. We are to go and make disciples of Jesus! I think God is tired of us saying, "I'll talk to that person later..." or "I'm way too afraid to share my faith with him/her." He wants us to boldly proclaim His words and deeds. Dave posed two questions during his talk that really struck me. The first question was this: "If we don't love people as God loves them, do we really know God?" I had to really think about that before it clicked. What does it mean to love others as God loves them? It means to be slow to anger, rich in kindness, and to love everyone with compassion. We are also to be quick to forgive. Loving others in this way is hard, yes, but it shows that we understand God's character (not that we ever fully will...but you get the idea). The second question Dave posed was this: "If we can't articulate our relationship with God, how do we know if we really have one?" Whoa. How convicting is that? This challenges me a whole lot. Not being able to talk to others about the nature of my relationship with God shows that I may not even have a very great one. I pray: Oh God...grant me Your spirit of boldness. Rid me of my spirit of fear!

One last thing to close this with. I got a text message this morning from a friend who has been struggling with "letting go and letting God." We had been talking the last couple of days about the power of prayer and how we always try to do things ourselves first before we let God handle them. I was really encouraged by this text message and I'd like to share it. In reference to a daily devotional, my friend says this: "The one for today was about praying and relying on God's strength throughout all your problems and not facing them with a spirit of cowardice. He always knows when to talk to you personally. :)" How wonderful...and how true, huh? We would have things so much easier if we would just pray about what's troubling us, and then let God take care of everything. Who are we to try and take control of our lives? God's the one with the power to change us and our circumstances! :)

I hope you were encouraged by all of this. And maybe challenged too. We're still in the very beginning of a brand new year. This could be a year of spiritual change for you...I know it will be for me. As I pray for God to guide me on His perfect path for my life, I will keep all of my friends and family (and you all reading this) in my prayers as well. I hope you're having a great week!

Wednesday, January 5, 2011

A Time of Joy

This new year is off to a great start. I had a wonderful New Year's Eve celebration with Lina and Jennifer in Indiana. And now the Lord has challenged me to a 21-day Daniel Fast for the first 21 days of the new year. I did the Daniel Fast this past summer with my friend/sister Ashley, and I really felt like God put it on my heart to do it again as a way to kick off the new year. Okay...so a few things first:

1. The Daniel Fast is totally biblical..."In those days I, Daniel, was mourning three full weeks. I ate no pleasant food, no meat or wine came into my mouth, nor did I anoint myself at all, till three whole weeks were fulfilled." Daniel 10:2,3. He ate only fruits and vegetables (no bread, no pasta, no meat) and drank only water for three whole weeks. He supplemented this with extra prayer times. Daniel fasted in order to be healthier and to receive direction and a clear vision from God. At the end of his fast, Daniel said this: "Suddenly, a hand touched me, which made me tremble on my knees and on the palms of my hands. And he said to me, 'O Daniel, man greatly beloved, understand the words that I speak to you, and stand upright, for I have now been sent to you...Now I have come to make you understand what will happen to your people in the latter days, for the vision refers to many days yet to come.'" Long story short, I truly believe that what God did for Daniel, He will do for us too.

2. Fasting is not dieting. Yes, it is a highly restrictive diet, but it is in no way a means by which to lose weight. At no time while I have fasted have I checked my weight on the scale. Yes, I've noticed a change in the way my clothes fit...but that is not any kind of motivation for me to fast. I am using these three weeks as a way to purify my body and bring my soul and mind closer to Jesus, my King.

I have received so much strength from the Lord in these first 5 days of this fast. He has spoken to me much more clearly. I actually heard my name twice today as I laid down for a nap. I think God was telling me that He saw my sacrifice and that it was good. And that I needed extra rest and energy. I am filled with so much peace right now...I have no fear, no anxiety...just joy and peace.

Just the other day the Lord put it on my heart to pray for my friend/sister Ashley (as mentioned above). I don't know how much I've written in here about our "falling out", but Ashley and I haven't been speaking for the past couple of months now. This is extremely hard on me. I lost not only a best friend, but a sister. Ashley and I have shared so many wonderful memories...I pretty much watched her grow up. Now she is going through a difficult period in her life...making her own choices and living her own way, and she has chosen to leave me out of it. It breaks my heart, but I know that she'll come back. I'll never stop loving her and I certainly will not stop praying for her. She needs God's grace and love more than anyone I know right now. Anyway, as I have been praying for Ashley this week, God has placed it on my heart to start a journal for her. I bought the most beautiful journal the other day...and I plan on filling it with stories, songs, and scriptures that either remind me of Ashley or just ones that I think would be good for her to read/see.



I plan on writing in this journal during this "in between time" while we're not talking. It helps me to re-live the good times and express some of the hurt that I'm carrying. I'm excited to see the finished product and to give it to Ashley when this is all over. I know that someday it will be. :)

Things are wrapping up as far as school goes, so that's pretty exciting. I only have this current semester left and then I'll be graduating! After that I'll be working all summer and then going on my GAP year (year-long mission trip). I am so excited to see how God will provide the money for me to go on this trip...it will truly be a miracle. Please keep me in your prayers as I continue this fast. I will definitely be praying for all of you as well. :) God bless!

Monday, January 3, 2011

Lovely

I heard this song today and thought it was blog-worthy. Enjoy. :)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fyfMZSaw0i0

Lovely by Sara Haze

I don't wanna be hurt
I just want to be little old me
Shouldn't have to think
Who am I suppose to be today
And what give you the right
To tell me who I should be
Who gave you that right

Cause I, I feel lovely
Just the way that I am
Yes I feel lovely
The way that I am

I know you want the best
Yeah only good things for me
But you have to realize
I can be all these things you project on me
Cause I'm beautiful to me
Doesn't that mean a thing

I feel lovely
Just the way that I am
Yes I feel lovely
The way that I am

I need that to be enough for you
Need that to be enough for you
Cause it's enough for me
It's enough for me

I'm I suppose to give up everything I am
Just to make you happy
I thought I was the one you
Always wanted me to be
It turns out I'm just little old me
I'm just little old me
And that's fine by me

Cause I, I am lovely
Just the way that I am
Oh yes I am,
Yes I am lovely
The way that I am
I am lovely lovely
I am lovely


I truly believe that I am lovely in my Father's eyes. He made me beautiful, gorgeous, perfect, and lovely in every way. I pray that you all may also see the beauty in yourselves and in God. You are made in His image!

Thursday, December 16, 2010

Missed Him

Much has changed since my last blog post. I have come back out of my spiritual dryness and have had some really great prayer times lately. Besides that article about journaling that I shared, a talk that I went to at my church really inspired me. The title of the talk was "The Smelly Stable," and it was basically about how our lives are a mess, and we often think we need to clean them up before we can let God back in. I know this is true a lot of times for me...I'll be stressed about school or work, get caught up in too much homework, and not be devoting any time to God. I'll think to myself, "Well, once I get my homework done, I'll start praying again" or "Once work gets less stressful, I'll have better prayer times." I never really thought "I want to have better prayer times now." It was always later, later, later. Well, I know from experience that sometimes later never comes. To get out of my spiritual dryness and my feelings of being overwhelmed and stressed, I needed to just start praying and talking to God again. Even though I didn't feel like it. And so I did...and gosh, I realized two things: 1) I really missed talking to Him, and 2) He really missed me!

My journal is caught up a bit more now, and I have been starting my mornings off by reading scripture or listening to Joyce Meyer on the radio. How much more smoothly my days go when I start them like this. The difference is truly amazing. :) I was able to get through finals week without too much stress, and now I know I will enjoy my Christmas break. I am looking forward to working more hours, resting on my days off, and spending time with my family and close friends. I hope you all had a good finals week and I wish you all a Merry Christmas. Bring it on, 2011!

Monday, December 6, 2010

Dry Time

I have been struggling lately with having a consistent prayer time. I have gotten pretty caught up in school and other things and I just haven't spent as much time in God's presence. Sure I've still been going to Mass, Cru, and UCO, but I haven't been reading my Bible every day, and I haven't been talking and listening to the Lord in quiet times. I also haven't been journaling, which is a big passion of mine. I love writing in a journal. It's a great way to record the ups and downs (and there are many!) of my spiritual life. I write about my successes, my failures, witnesses of God's work in my life, and prayers that I hold in my heart. When I'm having a rough day, I flip through my journal to an entry about a really great day, and my mood significantly brightens. My journal serves as proof that God really can stamp out the devil and his lies. I read a really great article about journaling yesterday in Joyce Meyer's magazine. It really spoke to my heart and confirmed what I had been feeling about my spiritual life. I'd like you all to read it, so I'll copy it here:

"Connecting With Your Heavenly Father" - Ginger Stache

The day I left home for college my dad gave me a gift, a yellow journal. He told me that he loved me and was going to miss our time together while I was away. He said my heavenly Father also loves me and craves spending time with me even more.

That yellow journal really cemented what my family had already taught me--spending time with God is not just a good idea; it's a necessity. Today I have a drawer full of journals documenting the ups and downs of my time with God.

I've been far from perfect. There are chunks of time missing here and there. Some of those periods I was devoting time to God but I wasn't writing. Other times I must admit, I was silent.

I went through one particularly trying period when I just couldn't write. It was one of the most difficult times of my life--a dry time with God. During this time most things in my life were shaken, including my confidence. There were many reasons those days were difficult but looking back I must ask myself, were they dry with God because He was silent or because I was?

You see, God is always faithful, and as my fervor for time with Him was renewed, so was my spirit and my confidence; however, I did not resume journaling. I cherished our time together but I was holding back my greatest passion--writing.

Then I received another gift. This time it was Joyce who gave me a journal, a pink one--so like her--with a note inside saying, "I thought I would help you get started journaling again." She knew just what I needed and it's what we all need--intimacy with God. For me, that comes through spending time in His Word and sharing my heart. For you it may be slightly different but it always involves giving Him our time.

I have learned over the years that my time with Him, reading the Bible, praying, and writing, is some of the sweetest of my life. I need it for survival. If you're not sure, give it a shot and I guarantee you'll see that it is a worthwhile investment. Some of you are saying, "How do I possibly find the time?" and I understand. It can be difficult with so many things pulling on us. Take it where you can. Schedule a few minutes where you can grab them and go from there.

I challenge you to make a commitment: Grab your Bible, a devotional you like, perhaps even a yellow or pink journal. This is a great time of year to begin, so do it now for you and for your family.

Give God your love and your time. Your Father misses you."


I found a lot of encouragement in that, and I hope you did as well. Please keep me in your prayers as I get things back on track with my spiritual journey.

Thursday, November 25, 2010

Blessings

It has been a little while, and I just want to reflect on God's goodness since then. I had a most wonderful 22nd birthday celebration, and I thank every single person that was somehow a part of it. It started the night before my birthday, when my mom bought me a "Birthday Princess" pin to wear to work the next day. I woke up the following morning for work, and my dad was in the kitchen preparing his special pancakes...Swedish pancakes. They're very similar to crepes, and they're my dad's best thing to cook. So I had a wonderful breakfast before I left for work. My day at work went pretty well. I had just started training as a cashier (I was a cashier assistant before), so it's been pretty exciting. It was pretty fun having all of the Costco members wish me a Happy Birthday. Sometimes I forgot I was wearing the pin, so I thought "How did you know it was my birthday?!" ...and then I looked down at my shirt. :) About halfway through my day, I had a surprise visit from my friend Jennifer and her grandmother Sittie. They brought me a HUGE bouquet of fresh flowers...with mostly Gerber Daisies, my favorite. :)



I was all smiles the rest of the day, and then came home to find a little surprise from my roommate Lina: pink streamers hanging in my bedroom doorway, plus a Happy Birthday balloon. :)



I changed out of my work clothes and freshened up a bit, then borrowed a birthday outfit from Lina. She and I share clothes a lot...it's usually one way (her borrowing from me), but this time I was successful in finding something I liked. :) My parents came over to my apartment to let me open my gifts from them before we all went out to dinner. My brothers came too, and it was really nice to see them dressed up.



We went out to dinner at Weber's in Ann Arbor, and the food was really delicious! There was a band that played afterwards, so that was fun as well. It was nice to spend some time with my whole family on my birthday. After we had finished eating, I headed back to my apartment to hang out with Lina...and to go find something free for my birthday. We ended up going to downtown Ann Arbor to get a free smoothie at Bubble Island. :) We hung out there for a while, then went for a long walk around town. It was freezing cold outside, but we really enjoyed just walking and talking.

The following day, Sunday, I went to church and then headed straight for work. We had quite the busy day at Costco, with everyone buying things for Thanksgiving. The day went by pretty quickly and I came home to find the apartment clean and decorated for my party that evening. :) Thanks Lina, Jennifer, and Kayla for your time and dedication! It was really nice to walk through that door after work and see the party all set up. I just had to be the birthday girl. :) The party had a really nice turnout. A bunch of my friends from UCO and Cru came, so it was good to see everyone meeting eachother and having a good time.



After the party, Jennifer stayed the night and helped Lina and me clean up the mess. It wasn't too bad to clean with three of us though, so that was nice. All in all, with my special day at work, dinner with my parents, and the party with my friends, I had a really great 22nd birthday. I am so thankful for such wonderful friends and family. I praise God for them everyday. :)

It's Thanksgiving Day now, and I'm looking forward to eating some great food and visiting with my cousins later. As I mentioned before, I am really grateful for what God has blessed me with...wonderful friends, great family, perfect health, and the constant reminders of His great love for me. I hope you all have a nice Thanksgiving (and Jennifer--Happy 24th Birthday!!), and that you enjoy spending time with your family.

God bless!